Charlie’s Angels Bombing Signals the Twilight of She-nema?

Can you make a story about 3 attractive, badass, ass-kicking females even more about female badass, gun-toting, man-beating, girl-power having badassery focusing even more on female nature and how much it means and have it be it be an entertaining a movie??? Sure, there’s proof. Watch Charlie’s Angels and see what folk said about it.

Can you make that story about 3 badass women a symbol and banner about feminism which is about strong independent and have it be financially lucrative? Nope, there’s proof. Watch Charlie’s Angels and see what folk said about it.

That makes no sense?

If you are like me and watched Charlie’s Angels, the action-comedy released in 2000 you’d get the first paragraph. I have yet to see this recent 2019 reboot the second paragraph referred to but some detractors and producers claimed it is a feminist film.

Femsploitation could be a genre of its own, no? I’ll go with She-nema or Fem-film.

Elizabeth Banks acted in and directed this 2019 reboot. She thought she must have been doing herself favors by drumming the feminist, girl power, future is female angle on this thing. The past was female too, and not just girl power spice girls circa back in the day, but I mean way back before circa was even a term. It just was circa times.

Many detractors are currently lulzing in vindication and some of the later reeeing in wrath. So from the ignorance of circa world from the creators to the detractors to insistence that everything is clown world. Let me summarize the general reaction from some corners of the net.


Yeah not buying that.

I can identify as a 7 foot tall, Zooey Deschanel-eyed, red headed, that is the first female astrophysicist of Nipponese ethnicity, but doesn’t mean I can show you what the current North Star is in a clear night sky let alone does it change my actual DNA.

Gene editing is coming but not yet, wont be getting those octopus camo and morphing skin mods. I can dream though...

We can have our opinions of what the product is, but forcing someone to accept that, is something else entirely.

are these the angels anyone is looking for?

Society hates female led projects starring females, right?

I’m unfamiliar with most of the cast. Saw a trailer a few times. Kristen Stewart is in it though. I like her face. Since Zathura. There may be possibly valid criticisms of her range but this is film. She acted in other films as that were overshadowed by Twilight Saga. I watched Adventure World , The Runaways and Into the Wild. So I like her face lack of emoting or not. She was enough of a screen presence added to the low level, mostly cringe vampire and werewolf Mythos to carry me through Twilight Saga.

Of which digression time.

Twilight was Twilight for gyads sake! Has anyone read the source content or thought of the primary target audience?

You are critiquing her in a film about a 100 year old glittery vampire in what I can only call a call the FBI right now on this mentally stunted into having the mentality to date a high-schooler that had middle age women doing their own pedo bearess fan-should-be-a-moming over Robert Pattinson?

Someone get Charlie on the phone. Any Charlie, either Charlie Swan to get the FBI or Chris Hanson tracking them or to Charlie to contract the Angels on a mission to hunt down these she-paedos.

I bet Robert Pattinsons recent distancing from that film not on strictly artistic merits but may have something to do with the fandoms toxic femininity.

So it’s not an aversion to female casts.

Neither is it to female storytellers. Elizabeth Banks whom, permit my assumption still identifies as a female, wrote, directed and produced, should know better. Know how I know this? She had Drew Barrymore on as an executive producer so I’m pretty certain she knows Drew Barrymore had her own well met and entertaining takes on the Charlie’s Angel story.

Banks had that history and template to build on just like Barrymore had with the original made for TV series that had 5 succesful seasons in its 1976-1981 run.

That was before I was born, before current year tech where you can essentially see anything from anywhere at any time. I can’t think of more than a few random images of the show. As for 2000 when Drew Barrymore’s entertaining and commercially succesful films’ take on Charlie’s Angels was released?

Lots of fond memories.

I was younger and less socio-politically aware but don’t recall thinking the characters were written as more meekly feminine, accessories to toxic males as opposed to the fantastically parodied macho macho woman of today, that don’t need no man because they could actually be a man.

The ladies had their own sort of beauty.

Barrymore with her wholesome looks and unpolished forwardness. Cameron Diaz a bubbly, ditzy but effervescent enthusiasm. Lucy Liu with her sensual take-no-bull primness. They were not pushovers, but were when it comes down to it, wire-fu, gun-totting characters in a make believe action comedy production. Hmm I could actually see a decent Powerpuff Girls movie with the characters they played in this film… certain archetypes and stories continue to be repeated.

Hollywood is people and people know people like looking at attractive things. And sure now folk can just get their staring fix online on-demand rather than wait for films or television shows. But the 2000 film and the 2003 sequel Charlies Angels : Full Throttle had memorable sequences, lines and scenes and could not rely solely on look at the pretty people’s faces.

Here are some in no particular order.

Drew Barrymore in LL Cool J Blackface before that was something that was both taboo and also could get you a second term as Canadas Prime minister?

Sam Rockwell singing and dancing that took a far more in sinister tone while still maintaining the memories of the campsite the series spent most of its time camping it up in.

Semi-Pro tip for creative storytellers: if you can nail the antagonist or villain in your story you’ll get the audience to meet you at least halfway in their engagement.

This is true of Full Throttle as well. Remember the Firestarter scene? Well most of it not including the board on a rope surfing shenanigans. Focus on the teamwork and the walking through the fire pre Connor Mcgregor Irish badassery of Justin Thoureax’s axe wielding lunatic character. (or was he Scottish whatever you get it)

Casting was choice with Bill Murray as the comical but paternal Bosley. Fight choreography that actually takes into account their physical statures, with the expected artificial movie logic added to it portrayed the angels as trained fighters but not invulnerable for bullets or feeling fear.

Cameron Diaz dancing in her panties because I’m actually not a 7 foot tall, Zooey Deschanel-eyed, red headed, first female astrophysicist of Nipponese ethnicity but instead a filthy CIS-het man and the innuendo of feeling free to stick things in her slot works for anyone anyway since it’s you know, Cameron Diaz dancing in her panties.*

Lucy Liu being horrible at cooking, which could be seen as a poke at females being in the kitchen but was done tastefully even with the pre playing to the hundreds of millions of potential Chinese viewers’ sensitivities Muffin scene.

That great 3 minute and 30 second single take shot sequence from Scrabble with Sam Rockwell saying he knows then Barrymore’s trademark since ET eye drawing in emotive gaze of concern leading, gun being drawn, Crispin Glover being creepy thin man which is tautological, as Marvin Gaye’s Got To Give It Up comes in, playing against the rising tension ending Barrymore’s character being shot and falling out of a the floor to ceiling window! KINO alert!

Films had great soundtracks. The way they integrated the song as having a character play it into the scene. I didn’t even know the name of the song when I first watched the film but did search and viola. Got to give it up indeed! I watch less today but think this is something overlooked in many current year films. Just throw things in because popular. No care for pacing and fit.

Ok last of the memorable thing list. Everything else Sam Rockwell did in the film because Sam Rockwell was doing it.

So enough of we the viewing public liked the premise from 79-81. Still did in 2000 and 2003. What happened in 2019?

What changed the reception of this every 2 decades we get new angels trend? Maybe the story is dead. Maybe there just wasn’t enough of an audience for this. Maybe the actual audience is still there and there is just so much more competition for limited time and money attached to completely unrealistic expectations for movies that are no longer actually that responsive to actual markets with comically inflated budgets.

Maybe it’s Trump.

Dyamn you 45!!!

not kino ≠ not good

Look at this post by Adam Scott.

So Adam Scott was in Party Down which may be coming back! Few other things. I like his work in general. Good to see him here with his kid. Someone said he was also supporting his friend Elizabeth Banks. In response someone asked how lying to a friend can be support.

A few things.

Good to remember that some of these posts are just like when we have our own personal day to day posts that are liked by the few people who still have us on their feeds. Difference is these folk are famous and it goes out to many more people.

Next the aforementioned Drew Barrymore thing. She was (is still?) a big name in the industry. She did have success in that series. Past the eye candy. Actual genuine, competent and entertaining film making and performances. Did I mention Sam Rockwell was in it? Because Sam Rockwell was in it. And Moon is certified no joke KINO.

We may crap on things forgetting all the people that have invested in their creation for various honorable reasons. No, I don’t think making money is shameful since I’m one of those who can happily play myself to sleep on Francisco D’Anconias Money Speech. I think Elizabeth Banks even in part as a competitive creative could have thought this may be her chance to shine like Barrymore did. Check the cast of the 2019 film. Recognized and respected thespians in there.

Much happens behind the industry.

Something can have certain intentions unknown to the general viewing public. K stew is building her career back up slowly and surely from some low place. No it isn’t the Twilight stereotyping or her supposedly amazing lack of range, there were some extracurriculars she was involved in. Involving others in the industry. Which likely adds some extra emphasis within her own circles. In general being associated with even a potential bomb continues to move that infamous episode further down the list of associations in people’s minds.

Just keep working, just keep working and that she has.

That looks like emotion to me.

You go K Stew!

Another consideration is rights to stories. Studio owns a property and if they don’t use it after a certain time it lapses and can be snatched up by others. I have ideas of alternate forms of creative crowd storytelling that i’ll share more about, but this film could be that, with the added K Stew willing to get some work next to some less known up and coming actresses and throw Banks a bone she can cut her teeth on angle. If it works good, if it doesn’t, meh.

‘But all the millions of dollars that were lost!’ You may say, ‘Its a clear failure!!!’

Despite what some may claim the current economic system isn’t failing capitalism. The industries we see have been mutated by the fiat currency stats mandated and regulated economic system. Direct monetary profit is not the determinant of success of failure. There are many factors that go into why things are done. I don’t consider this film to be a possible make work endeavor like the entire public sector that so many still think is somehow succesful. that term ‘public servant,’ stahp. I mean come on, they freakin’ pay salaries with taxed money then tax those very same salaries! Folk working in these jobs can get tax breaks for buying products and materials they need for work with money taxed from the purchasing of said products. Grrrr, the reasons given in support of this mess and its continued failures are similar to those Elizabeth Banks gives about her film.

Nonsensical caricatures of unreality.

Anyway there is the employment factor. Folk fed families, paid insurances, got their first jobs on this project. Even if there are a few that could have been using such things as money laundering vehicles, in general as it mostly is with humans. Even humans that make up the state which is an institution I consider to be the main predator in most of civilized society. It was mostly harmless.

Speaking of mostly harmless, did you watch Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy? Not only is it a fantastic example of capturing the spirit of great source material and converting it into a screen play great visuals and visualizers in the form of Zooey Deschanel’s god-tier eyes but most importantly and topical is that Sam Rockwell was in it.

Back to Scott and his daughter.

Remember those Twilight should-be-moms? Demographics are a thing to consider. How many actual fans of Charlie’s Angels are now actually moms or dads that would think, this is what I should go watch with my kids?

In 2000, I can imagine parents in their 30’s and 40’s that remembered the series going with their kids. They get to relive a small screen experience on the big screen and through the minds of their kids. I don think that carries as much with those that may have seen Barrymores film in their youth to another film now. Even beyond the supposed less folk having kids issue.

This film may have done better dropping the Charlie’s Angels connection and attempting a new IP. Name recognition needs there to be people who recognize it and envision a similar pleasant experience to memories they have occurring.

I didn’t get any of Drew, Lucy and Cameron’s films from the trailers of Bank’s attempt. But who am I to judge?

honesty bombs

What can I know about the motives of the people involved?

Sure someone other than Adam’s daughter may have taken that picture as a commentator claimed. Sure Banks may have paid him or some PR agency for some sort of native advertising. If it’s not being done by someone somewhere, it needs to be. In current year advertising is an if you got money you don’t $ave that money spend it to get that money! racket

We get that advertising is mostly variations of lies.

In this specific case we are dealing with actors, writers, directors and others paid by an industry that is essentially built on shilling stuff they pretend to be something that it actually isn’t.

How many of you work in occupations where you say things you don’t believe to be entirely true, if not abject lies? How many of you have friendships like that? How many of you think your family depends on you doing just that?

On a strictly marketing aspect I would consider this Charlie’s Angels a fail. The amounts of money spent in marketing have ballooned to levels where they routinely surpass the cost to create the product. This is actually more common across other fields as well though…but ever wonder why you dont see commercials on television for high end sports cars?

I’d like to have trailers for films that have content that isn’t in the film but some may consider this to be false advertising I don’t expect whats shown in the film to be whats actually happening ‘in real life,’ but some consider films to be synopses of our day to day lives. Maybe thats what people are objecting to, Mr. Scott cant really be advertising that there was content in the trailer that was descriptive enough of what is presented in the film to have any positive look on it.

Subjective for sure.

The claim about friendship not involving lying though, is inaccurate. If this is a supportive fib for a friend. Not saying it is, but IF it is, then it’s in the same ball park of ‘they dindu nuffin wrong, no one could have seen this coming’ rationalizations to cover up previous avoidance of delivering a message that could have gotten your relationship figuratively shot.

Honesty isn’t as welcomed or expected and many if not most friendships are defined by the lies you are willing to tell each other rather than the truths you point out. Especially if it’s about something Banks has personal reasons to really care about.

I’d rather not have someone say what they think I want to hear even if they think the truth may hurt, but my valuation of honesty may be somewhat socially unhealthy.

Depending on your actual target audience there may be little to no reason to advertise in certain ways. Are there enough feminist themes in the movie to cut a trailer that makes it seem like peak She-nema and enough of a demand for that to warrant doing so?

Elizabeth Banks may have thought so.

‘But its more than that, look how vociferous and toxic she’s been! She believes she is an actual activist!’


Nothing about activists, activism, Elizabeth banks, Hollywood or human beings makes me think she can’t honestly believe she’s an activist. Have you read the Bible?

Many otherwise fully functional people will on one hand say that claims that lived experience of female oppression proves white males are born evil is are baseless lies but lived experience of a sky deity’s activities is enough to believe we all started from a dirt created man whose rib created female partner is the reason we are all born with original sin is indisputable truth.

Yeah Banks could believe she is an activist. Doesn’t mean she is one. Doesn’t make the film about feminism. Doesn’t mean the film is a sort of Hiroshima and Nagasaki level A-Bombing that will end the supposed feminist full spectrum war on culture.

That’s a deeper ‘conflict’ that has been going on much longer that most realize and will continue fore the foreseeable future.

Agreed few people want to watch this, and I’d likely think the movie was meh if I ever watched it. Which I may if it was randomly on and I had time..cause as I said, I like looking at Kristen Stewart’s face.

Video of the post

Actually two songs from asian artists titled ‘Get That Money.’ Good to see the way flows and content can be found all over the place. Future is bright for art.

Did this video bomb because its only 2.3 million views? Or is there just a limited target audience that feels this that should inform the descisions made in how much to spend for the project?

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One response to “Charlie’s Angels Bombing Signals the Twilight of She-nema?

  1. Pingback: American Gods | Watch, Listen, Read or Play? | Rant A. Tonne·

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